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Over the years, I’ve tried so hard to understand people’s behaviors.

Their personalities, why they act they way they do, their anger, and other expressions.

As humans, it is natural to judge a book by its cover. we might disagree with this but it’s the truth.

I’ve met people for the first time and judge them just from a conversation.

I’ve been bitter towards people because they were unkind to me a certain time.

I’ve been unfriendly to people because I felt they were also unfriendly to me so reciprocating the energy was the best option for me.

Some times back, I was so deep in my thoughts and I asked myself, “Opane, do you take a moment to really know why people behave the way they do” I couldn’t answer myself.

Then, I did some research on human behavior and I was amazed at the things I discovered.

People behave based on where they come from, the orientation they received while growing up, trauma from past experiences, what they see or read, how they feel others perceive them.

There are so many reasons why people behave the way they do.

I always try to know people on a deeper level from the way they communicate, how they react to certain situations, their perspective about life in general.

I could easily detect a person’s mood just by communicating with them and that gives me a clue on what to say and what not to say at that particular time.

You can meet a person that lashes out at any slight inconvenience.

That could be his/her own way of expressing emotions.

The possible reasons could be stress or a trigger from an experience.

One would want to know why this person is like that and the interesting part is, this person that always lashes out is the most sweetest person to others.

I’ve met so many people like this.

Personally, I am a very reserved person.

I barely make friends easily or initiate conversations with strangers especially.

I always get the “you are too quiet”  or “you don’t like people” line all the time.

I feel I have to be comfortable around people.

I have to trust people to be able to create a space for them.

I met someone who everyone feels is unapproachable or hostile to an extent.

Getting to know this person, I discovered that the environment this person comes from is a factor to the behavior.

One could see that there’s always a defense coming from this person especially towards people who openly show their dislike.

When dealing with people, always do these things:

Always understand the behavior 

Communicate clearly 

Always show empathy

Consider people’s backgrounds 

Be respectful 

Practice mindfulness 

Don’t take things personally 

Always show love regardless 

Opane_

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Men’s mental health awareness

When I started writing about mental health, I got inspired by people around me.

Daily, I see people going through so much but always keep a smile.

Anytime I ask the question “how are you doing? “

I always get the “I am fine” response 

To be honest, I am one of those people 🙂

Most times, we carry burdens too heavy for us and then fall when it gets too heavy.

It’s men’s mental health awareness month and I wonder if men also go through mental health issues.

While growing up, I used to see only the women going through a lot of issues but the men always smile and make sure things go well especially in homes.

As I grew older, I discovered there are men who go through a lot of things.

Both the married and unmarried men.

These men go through rejection, pressure from family and friends, problems from work and home, decision making, and a lot of other problems.

As a man, you have to always be strong no matter what happens.

If a man opens up about his problems, the man is labeled “weak” by the society so he keeps to himself.

Dear men, it is very okay to seek help from a mental health specialist when needed.

You are not weak but strong when you seek help.

The society may talk down on you for being vulnerable or soft but, you grow stronger when you accept that you are mentally drained and need help.

Stay strong 

Don’t be afraid to open up

You are loved and appreciated 

Your decisions shouldn’t be from pressure

Never put your life on a hold

Be motivated

Opane_